Posts Tagged ‘fate’

Palm reading

This is one of my weirdest abilities. I had given it up, honestly because it had become tooooo troublesome. I never “learned” to read palms, honest. I just could. I could look at a palm of someone [previously unknown to me] and just babble away things he/she would only know or been their deep life secrets.

I never took this seriously, and thought it pretty much a fluke each time. I thought it was all jokes, and I even invented stupid rules to keep people at bay, until one day I realized that some people believed in this stuff. SO whatever I may have been babbling may have affected their life, or caused them to alter…. that was bad.. I mean it was never intentional…

That’s the shitty part of having insight into anything. You know the feeling when your good at something, your sooo good, that you feel helpless that you can’t help somebody, because ultimately there’s nothing you can do….


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This is the most weirdest entity that probably governs our life. Never is it easy to come to terms with what Fate will throw at our feet. Probably we have thought too far as to coin a word to explain all the inexplicable, or the unexpected.

So obviously, Australia didn’t work out. Never got there, never got to go there. Tough luck I’d say. Wasn’t this calm when it all sprung up, but hey everybody’s entitled for some human emotions now and then.

Previous life experiences keep butting in and leaving messages in my head, saying chin up…. it’s all for the best or it’s all for the greater good.

Its just that I didn’t realize that I had built a lot of hope on this, and when it blew in my face, it was a bit unbearable.

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Hello my dear readers..

Sorry of course for the long pause, but that’s something I forgot to warn you about.. I will disappear again like this from time to time.. its job related.. so hope you can bear up.

Well its been 2 hell of a long weeks and I finally get that few days off! Phew.. and I come home in the wee hrs and guess what.. I can’t sleep.. I was dozing away in the bus… couldn’t keep my eyes open.. but here I am cozy in bed.. wide awake..

So i decide to update my blog…
Lately I have been thinking on the good ol’ lines of “nothing actually matters”… Please don’t think I’m that pessimist slob that get into other peoples work and don’t do anything myself..
Its just that lately I feel everything has its own way of going about things and that we merely help it or slow it down, but never completely can change its course..

Sent to a Catholic school, and forced to believe in Hell and Heaven from quite a small age, trust me this all is new to me. I was the model student in my class. The nerd. And that too in everyway. Not just studies… even life, I thought was controllable through strict discipline. Then I got packed away to med school and my whole life changed.

It was the “being away” thing… no rules… the freedom.. that got me started.

Anyway, last night I pretty much came to the conclusion that “doctors” are actually a bunch of useless people. Doctors help you with your cold, stop your diarrhea etc etc, hey but they can’t cure cancer.. they can’t stop a patient dying..
I’m not searching for the cure for eternal life.. but its just that our options are so limited. Lets face it, Animals survive quite well without doctors.
From the beginning of time, man has lived, evolved and survived. Ok they did use small bits and pieces of knowledge to help them along the way, but they were destined to die one day and so they did. You come to this world with a plan and route set out. You accomplish it and you are off stage. You are remembered by what you did or didn’t do during this time!

So then why go in search of more knowledge? All the technology has made doing one thing simple, whilst making ten other things harder.
IN the olden days, peopled walked long distances. Now we drive a car. To fill the tank of this car we work 8 hr shifts 5 times a week, 4 times a month. I bet the stress accumulated during this month is far more than walking the intended distance back and forth the whole week!

So is man’s race for technology a blessing or are we cursed?

Last week one of my patients crashed.. Dimethoate poisoning, early 30’s male. First respiratory arrest, then cardiac. We struggled with him for 2 hrs. He just wouldn’t budge. Announced him dead another 30 minutes later. Then when I took a final look at him while taking off my gloves, I realized.. Just what did we do to him.. he had tubes and wires popping out of every hole in his body.. and that too we had succeeded in artificially keeping him alive for nearly one and half hours.
Still he was meant to depart this world. Against all our efforts, he did so half an hour later.

SO was it worth it all?
Some would say he’s in a better place. Others, “oh such an untimely death” and me… I’m just loosing my faith

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