Ok… catchy and offensive sounding heading …. I Know! [but none meant]

First things first, I have nothing against Gay people! I respect them as any other human being, ‘cos frankly what they do in their own time, in their own privacy is of no concern to me.

Even though the sri lankan penal code still states otherwise…..

But apparently enough, they are top notch with technology… impressive!


I kind of understand, given the very small percentage of people that are computer literate in this country, that big Payment Gateway companies like Paypal, etc don’t want the trouble of dealing with us. Also considering how closed our banking system is… perhaps due to inflation. Still it really BEATS ME WHY there is so few methods to send money out of the country [ and you need a legitimate reason for it, i.e. like education, living expenses for students, etc ], but tons of ways to receive it! Even famous international money transaction services like Western Union, are not of any help.

MY humble question is why doesn’t any of the huge business giants in the country organize a system like Paypal, where money can be sent using [not just an email address, but through verification of ID], that’s linked to the local banks so that we can receive as well as send. Lets face it, the policy of trying to keep all the cash inside the country is kind of cool, hoping that we’ll be filthy rich by say 3010, but hey, I can think of many instances a lot of cash went missing in this country, and most probably landed in accounts off-shore…. how convenient!

And to think that even putting money in the bank is taxable now, I mean they tax us just for having money in the bank… 0.01% of all debits. Scrutinous amounts you may argue, but its not the amount that matter me, the idea behind it.

If they actually maintained the roads, built new highways, introduced new sanitation systems, organised the national transport system, [this list goes on till infinity] etc, etc, I don’t mind paying 20% tax like in some european countrys.

Back to my payment gateway systems, there are several gateway systems operated by local private banks, but registration with them is limited to registered businesses and they have quite a large overghead charge.

If such a system were available to the common man in sri lanka, within the internet, I assume the many uses and profits would be thousand fold. Sure there would be a substantial investment required for it, but you got to spend money to earn money.


Yes, the dufus that I am, I was wondering why NOBODY left any comments lately [good or bad], and feeling kinda repressed and alienated, no more than I usually am, I guess it was sheer desperation that lead me to check the freaking settings tab in my admin panel.. only to be assured that yes I am a dufus indeed.

Sorry folks for all the times you wanted to shout out at me but I had so egoistically left you no option to leave a comment.


Followed up Indi’s lead about this film

This is one of the BEST films I have ever seen on lines of ‘American Beauty’ several years ago. But this film is SO GRAPHIC, and the acting of Ben Whishaw, how he shows us his reactions and feelings for each smell…

Some consider the ending not so fitting, but I guess he had his moment of glory, and all through the film, his modesty, innocence, humbleness are virtues that highlight this movie.

This film is definately for the senses, unluckily media has no way of propagating smell, otherwise this film would have been well… a disaster worldwide… 😉 [you’ll know what I mean if you watch the film]

Plus: This film is exactly what I was talking about in my previous post:

That’s the shitty part of having insight into anything. You know the feeling when your good at something, your sooo good, that you feel helpless that you can’t help somebody, because ultimately there’s nothing you can do….

Palm reading

This is one of my weirdest abilities. I had given it up, honestly because it had become tooooo troublesome. I never “learned” to read palms, honest. I just could. I could look at a palm of someone [previously unknown to me] and just babble away things he/she would only know or been their deep life secrets.

I never took this seriously, and thought it pretty much a fluke each time. I thought it was all jokes, and I even invented stupid rules to keep people at bay, until one day I realized that some people believed in this stuff. SO whatever I may have been babbling may have affected their life, or caused them to alter…. that was bad.. I mean it was never intentional…

That’s the shitty part of having insight into anything. You know the feeling when your good at something, your sooo good, that you feel helpless that you can’t help somebody, because ultimately there’s nothing you can do….

Mixed feelings

This is about mixed feelings. I can’t event think about what to write first.

In realilty, I am a very quite person. I love the morning dew on my face, the birds chorus, the hot milk coffee. I have a deep wish to do good for my country and people all over. I prefer to do this in my own secret ways. I love to read. I don’t watch Sri Lankan TV unless for a news update.

In real life I’m the mean, stern and ruthless doctor who everyone hates. Some may think of me as having a superiority complex, while others just think I’m darn rude. With every patient I see, I have to come down to their level. Have at least an understanding of their life, society and main causes of woe. And many a time, my patients are those who think they can’t deal with life anymore and resort to poisons as a way of suicide.

But why the double face you ask? Its for my own protection. From a variety of reasons and scenarioes:

  • When dealing with suicidal patients, its extremly difficult to get them to cooperate. They are on the brink of death, and you’re the only thread they have to hold on too. And with such patients you can’t have that “Where does it hurt?, Can you take this tablet?” kindness crap, ‘cos they are hallucinating, delirious or just plain unconscious. I even have to yell to get the people who bring in the patient to cooperate as to finding out what was the poison, why go for suicide etc. People expect miracles, when they bring patients to hospitals. Because they come and want to WATCH!! And when I ask them a question, its like disturbing someone when their watching a movie! What happened to lending a helping hand?
  • And then there are people who think I’m just there to hurt them. I mean seriously! Everybody is entitiled to their own opinions, sure, but some common sense, that this person is trying to make you see tommorrows sunrise just won’t sink in. This is worse for the valuable staff I have around me. They are trained like me to deal with gruelling ordeals. To be efficient, they have to be strict and stern. If they were all soft and marshmellow, the patient would be 6 feet deep the next day. Just to think what these staff [nurses, attendents etc] go through a day. Strange enough, even in the blogosphere I find people call them names.
  • Just how to deal with the truth? Just imagine a scene like this [post from GutterFlower]. If you were the doctor treating the woman brought into hospital, with a lamenting “husband”? Even if you fall for the initial story of ‘Ane mage nona kalanthe damma’ [My wife fainted], you would soon notice the deepening blue patches on her body. Then it would be evident to any fool why she fainted!

So it works well for me to be cold hearted, at least appear to be. Your feelings are only for you. But to keep a promise I made to protect all life one day I act stern, stubborn and just damn crazy, so that the few select who cross my path in life may see another sunrise, feel the dew on their face, hear the chorus of the birds….


This is the most weirdest entity that probably governs our life. Never is it easy to come to terms with what Fate will throw at our feet. Probably we have thought too far as to coin a word to explain all the inexplicable, or the unexpected.

So obviously, Australia didn’t work out. Never got there, never got to go there. Tough luck I’d say. Wasn’t this calm when it all sprung up, but hey everybody’s entitled for some human emotions now and then.

Previous life experiences keep butting in and leaving messages in my head, saying chin up…. it’s all for the best or it’s all for the greater good.

Its just that I didn’t realize that I had built a lot of hope on this, and when it blew in my face, it was a bit unbearable.